i've had this strange feeling take me over the passed month or more...it's hard to explain and i'm reluctant to mention it for fear it might go away...it's this feeling like my life is not my life anymore...if that makes any sense...that no matter what i plan to do, these things will not happen...that i have absolutely no control...that i just have to go the direction life is taking me...and i have no idea what direction this is...when i fight against it everything goes wrong...something deep inside me has changed...i can't explain it, but it's a beautiful thing...i'm just going to keep going...let myself be swept in this current...this zeitgeist...i'm going to go whereever this road is taking me...

it's not something extraordinary...it's ordinary...i think anyone can do it...experience it...it excites me...